Hate me Break me, Love me Mend me
by insertyournamehere
Summary: New pilots, and old pilots. they must come together once more to prevent the Angels from gaining victory. Will the be succesful?WARNING Violence, abuse, ect.
1. Pretty little thing

A/N: Woo. I do not own Evangelion. I do not own the plot, nor do I own the characters. I have taken liberties with many things, as you will notice. Hopefully this will not upset you, or influence how much you enjoy it. The song that is quotes is sung by Rufus Wainright. I do not own the song, the lyrics or anything that has to do with it.

I do believe that is everything. Now please, enjoy nn

The fifth Eva unit was nearly destroyed during transportation. An angel attacked. We managed to salvage both the Eva, and the pilot. The young man, however is in critical condition. He is currently being tended to in the hospital.

A brunette stopped a nurse walking out of a room, enquiring about the person inside of it. After a very short conversation, the nurse nodded and the teen was allowed in. Inside the room was a woman with purple hair whom the brunette could only assume was Misato.

"Good day, Ms. Misato." She said, bowing.

"Please, no miss. It's depressing." Misato mumbled, waving her hand. "And you would be?"

"Adrian. Adrian Bellview." The girl said with a nod of her head and a small smile.

"This fine young man would be Aida Kensuke. He was… wounded on the way here. I trust you will be quite capable of looking after him?" The woman enquired, fidgeting with her slinky black dress, "I have to er… meet someone."

"I most certainly can, Major." Adrian smiled that smile again, her lilac eyes sparkling.

"Thank you very much." Misato said with a nod and a large grin. And with that, the responsible adult left the room.

Adrian moved the chair from against the wall to the window before seating herself. She admired the wonderful garden that kind people had aided in planting. She felt sorry for Aida, who looked as if he would have pain doing anything for the next while. Bandages wrapped themselves around his head and chest, with some most likely finding their way to his legs. A cast made sure that his right wrist was unusable, until it healed.

"Poor guy." She joked aloud to herself. She chuckled and turned back to the window, humming a quiet, sad tune. She tucked her long chestnut brown hair behind her ear before she bent down to fix her boot and tighten the laces, all the while humming to herself.

"She tied you to a kitchen chair, she broke your throat and she cut your hair, and from your lips, she drew the hallelujah." Aida spoke the words as she hummed the tune.

"You know it!" She exclaimed happily. Then remembering her manners, she stood and smoothed out her black, skintight t-shirt and bowed.

"I am Adrian Bellview. Pleased to make your acquaintance, Mr. Aida." She spoke softly, in a voice that seemed as though it had never seen any unhappiness.

"Oh, um… you can call me Kensuke. Everyone does." He stammered, blushing. Adrian merely smiled and walked over, picking up his glasses from the table on the way there. She stood at his bedside, offering him the seeing devices as if they were to seal a peace treaty of some sorts. Upon adjusting them on his face, he looked up at the girl and gasped. Dark brown hair framed an almost sickly pale face. Freckles dusted her rosy cheeks and her pale pink lips were curved with a smile.

"What's it like, to be in an Eva?" She asked as if she were a curious seven year old.

"It's, I… it's… umm… like sitting in a computer chair? I guess. You're connected to the uh, nerve system. Y'know, so you don't total the damn thing. Like, anything that happens to the Eva kind of happens to you, to a much lesser degree of course, but the pain is still there. Sometimes, they are difficult to pilot them. One of my friends thinks that it is because they have a mind of their own." He stammered through an explanation he felt was entirely half assed.

"It must have hurt a lot. What happened to you, I mean." She spoke softly. Kensuke avoided her gaze.

"Why do you think the angles are here? When do they usually show up?" She changed the subject, obviously sensing how awkward he felt to talk about it. He didn't much like to say he lost control of the damn thing.

"Anytime. They show up anytime they feel like. There's no pattern. It could be three in the morning or eight at night. As for why they're here… I… I don't know." He looked away, obsessively smoothing the blankets. He couldn't tell her why they were here. He was under quite strict orders that she was not to know.

Thankfully, Ritsuko saved him. An angel of mercy, for the moment.

"Adrian. We need you. Right away." The blond woman spoke hurriedly.

"It was nice meeting you. I will see you later, Kensuke." She smiled as she stood, regarding Ritsuko with a seriousness that threw the young man off.

"Show me where I am to go." She said as she walked past the blonde woman. Ritsuko merely gave Kensuke a puzzled look before following the seventeen year old.

Misato met her at the entrance, looking rather peeved and frazzled. Instead of greeting the girl, she grabbed Adrians arm and pulled her along as she explained everything.

"Listen to me, and you listen closely. We don't have time to repeat anything." The Captain said, pulling Adrian into an elevator and pressing the button for the eighteenth floor harder than what was necessary. "As soon as we get down there, you will be shoved into something called an 'entry plug'. That will be put into the Eva, unit oh-five for the time being, where the tube will fill with a liquid. It's okay to breathe it in, no harm done." The doors dinged as the opened and Misato pulled the poor girl along like a child would her doll. " As soon as you are in there, the nerve system gets connected, so don't do anything stupid. Your weapon is a sword, strictly for that Eva only. When you arrive above ground, be ready for anything. Did you get that all?"

"I guess… I'll just go with the flow." She grinned and gave the woman a half smile before hopping into the entry plug. Misato merely groaned and held her head in her hand. Adrian panicked when the fluid flooded the plug, but only for a few moments. When the Eva was launched her stomach lurched, not ready for the sudden jolt. And the moment the sunlight hit her eyes, all she could see was the enemy. And it stared back.

Adrian shouted and grabbed its head with her left hand, squeezing. The bizarre looking creature grabbed the Evas arm and pulled, tearing it at the elbow. Adrian shouted various things, pulling the massive weapon form its sheath on her back and swept it in a large semi circle, nicking the Angel and drawing its strange blood. Angered, the Angel grabbed the sharp blade, pulling it from Adrians grip. Her lilac eyes widened when she realized what was going to happen. Apparently, so did unit oh-five.

Unable to control the massive machine as it leapt towards the Angel, Adrian tearfully begged it to listen, jerking the control on either side of her in a futile effort to regain control. When the blood and entrails started to fly, Adrian turned to Misato.

"Please Major Katsuragi… please…" She sobbed, "Please just make it all stop! MISATO!" She screamed, her voice echoing through the headquarters. Misato desperately shouted orders for another Eva to be sent up to retain unit oh-five, to have all the sensory systems cut off, anything to stop her from suffering. They all watched in horror as the Angel made on last attempt to gain control by ramming the bloodied hilt of the sword directly into the Evas stomach. It broke through the armor, burying itself into the soft flesh that lay underneath. Angered instead of weakened, the bloodthirsty Eva feasted on.

And Adrian watched in horror, her gentle lilac eyes wide, blood running from her nose and onto her shirt. Something tightened around her neck. Around the Evas neck. Her vision blurred and thought raced frantically though her mind. What's happening? Why do I hurt? Why is it doing this? What are Angels? What are…

She woke up three days later in the hospital.

"She was terrified. You can't let her back in that thing!"

"I know how you feel, but we need all the people we can get."

"Why her? Can't you find someone else?"

" What if it had been someone else? Would you be acting this way?"

Voices. What were they talking about? They seemed like they were angry upset words. Her eyes swam in and out of focus. Her throat ached and her stomach felt empty. She tried to move her hand to cover her eyes. Something was far too bright fo her liking. Oh? Something is blocking out the light? A person? Yes! Misato? Why yes. Yes it is.

"Adrian?"

A mumbled response. "Are you okay?"

"Just dandy. All I need is a bluebird on my shoulder." She choked out, her voice raspy and wounded.

"Right." Misato replied. She didn't have the patience for witty retorts.

"I feel numb, okay? I can't see straight and nothing seems to be responding."

"That should change soon. I have to leave. Kensuke is here. He will keep you company and take you home later today." And with that their purple haired Captain departed. Adrian turned her head, the only motor function she could control at the moment and smiled at Kensuke.

"Didn't think I'd be seeing you again like this." She smiled. Amazing, he though. She can smile after what had happened to her. And knowing from his experience it wasn't pleasant, he had to admire her courage.

He chuckled nervously and ran a hand through his dirty blond hair. He suddenly felt glad that she couldn't see well, for his cheeks had turned a lovely shade of pink. "Yeah. Who'dve thought it." He joked, and instantly felt lame. But she still laughed. A light laugh that floated on the surprisingly warm fall air. Her laughter quietly faded and her smile disappeared.

"Kensuke? What happened to me? Why can't I move?" She sounded close to tears. And oh! How his heart ached.

"You don't remember what your Eva did to that thing?" Kensuke asked, surprised.

"I… I do." She turned her head away from him, "But I don't know why I can't move."

Kensuke felt his eyebrow twitch. He couldn't believe that no one had informed her of what she had been doing to herself in her state. "Adrian, you um… they had to restrain you so that you uh… didn't… hurt yourself, anymore. When you were sleeping, I assume you had a nightmare, or something. It was two days ago, I was still in the hospital. You woke me up too. You were screaming, clawing at your arms. Crying. There was a lot of blood. They said some of it came from agitating your wounds, your nose, and what you were doing to yourself. You got up and started throwing things too." He finished off his speech by taking a deep breath and looking at her. Crystalline tears fell from her eyes.

"Oh Adrian, I didn't mean to upset you. I really didn't!" He exclaimed, swooping down to his knees at her bedside. Adrian merely shook her head and wept.

Once again she woke up in the hospital. Same day, but later on in the afternoon, close to dinnertime. The room had a dark blue tinge to it, an almost serene feel. Kensuke walked back into the room just then, a bottle of water in hand.

"They say you can go home now. They'll be down in a moment to get you ready." He smiled, trying to be reassuring.

"Kensuke… where are you staying?" she asked, catching the nineteen year old off guard.

"I, uh… have been staying in a hotel. They… haven't found me an apartment yet." He stammered, once again feeling like a dolt.

"If you would like, you could stay with me. Of course, NERV will have to properly equip the place, but I do believe that it is large enough to hold you and the rest of the pilots when they arrive." She spoke softly and smoothly, despite her ravaged throat.

"I… I would like that very much." He smiled and sat down beside her bed.

"Thank you, Kensuke."


	2. Please Hold Me

A/N: I do not own Evangelion. I do not own the plot, nor do I own the characters. I have taken liberties with many things, as you will notice. Hopefully this will not upset you, or influence how much you enjoy it.

Adrian heavily leaned on Kensuke as he led them up the driveway and onto the porch. He pushed open the door and was met by four sets of eyes, two of which were glaring at him suspiciously.

"Hello all." She smiled gently and greeted them. Their expressions softened, but still held that hard edge. A man who looked to be twenty four was one of the ones glaring at him. His curly, light brown hair looked to be in need of a trim and his glasses were slipping down his nose as he regarded Kensuke as one might regard a speck of dust. The other not-so-friendly man had dark hair that stood up in spikes, his dark blue eyes not faltering as they followed his movement. The other two at the table were women, and looked as though he might be interesting.

"Adrian! Are you okay?" The one with the glasses asked, standing up so abruptly his chair fell over. He ran over, relieving Kensuke of his burden and leaving him to feel very awkward. The one with the spiky hair stood and walked over, standing on Adrians other side.

"No, Liam. Just a moment. Tim, quit touching me, that shoulder hurts." She murmured. Both the men backed away, reluctantly giving her the space she requested.

She motioned Kensuke to stand beside her. "Kensuke, this is Liam and Tim. Liam is my brother and Tim is a close friend." She pointed to the one with glasses first and the the one with the hard blue eyes. "The blond one at the table is Clarissa and the brunette is Kokobunji. Koko, for short." Adrian smiled at Kensuke, hooking loose strands of hair behind her ear. "Everyone, I would like you to meet Kensuke, your new roommate."

The silence seemed to last forever, but no one challenged her.

"I'll just uh… go, get my stuff and unpack, I guess." He stuttered, turning to go back to the car to retrieve his belongings.

"I'll go with you." Tim spoke up, following close behind. As soon as the two young men were out of earshot from everyone, Tim roughly grabbed Kensukes shoulder, spinning him around and shoving him into a tree. Kensuke let out a groan, rubbing his head, unable to do much more as Tim had moved right into hi face, gripping the collar of his short in a powerful fist.

"You listen here. If I EVER see you touching that girl again, I will hurt you. She's mine, and you aren't going to change that." He hissed, jerking his fist tighter, putting his face closer to Kensukes.

"Just because we're both pilots will do nothing to change that." And with that, the smaller man left. Kensuke, slightly unnerved that he may be sharing a room with that guy, straightened his glasses and shirt, and continued down to his car.

" What on earth happened to you? And since when do you decide who lives with us and who doesn't?" Liam demanded, facing his younger sister.

"Liam, I'd rather not talk about it right now. And Kensuke is someone I work with. When he comes in, show him to my room. I need to take a nap and talk to him." She spoke softly, turning away from her brother and heading down the hallway. When Kensuke returned to the house, his bags in his arms, Liam merely mumbled Adrians instructions and watched him suspiciously as he walked down the hall. Adrian stirred but did not wake when he set his bags down. So he quietly set about unpacking his belongings, feeling quite uncomfortable in the house. He found himself wondering about the relationship between Tim and Adrian. What had they done? Was she happy being with him? Was he forcing her into things?

Kensuke rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on.

"Are you okay, Aida?" Her light voice asked, laced with pain.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine." He responded, pushing his glasses up on his nose and giving her what he hoped was a convincing smile.

"I hope you're okay with sharing this room. I figured that you may not be comfortable with my brother or Tim. They… they tend to be a little over protective." She smiled apologetically.

" they most certainly are." He muttered under his breath. " Um, Adrian, I hope you don't mind me asking, but uh… I guess it'll bother me if I don't but… what's going on between you and Tim? He doesn't seem to be too friendly." Kensuke asked, running his hand through his messy dirty blond hair.

To his surprise, she laughed. "Nothing Kensuke. We've been good friends since we were little. Why?"

Kensuke felt relief wash over him. "Nothing. No reason." He murmured. "I uh… appreciate that… you're sharing your room with me." He smiled, sincerely this time. But still, he felt that his chances with her were minimal, what with the others arriving tomorrow and all. He knew that she would probably fall for Touji, much like all the other girls did. Kensuke always ended up losing any girls interest as soon as they found out he was friends with THE Touji. They always like him more, him and his muscular body from playing all those sports. Touji was the handsomer one, he didn't hide behind a camera, was always the one on the field and not the one cheering him on. He mentally sighed, realizing that chances were slim to none that she would take interest in him.

"Would you like to go for a walk with me?" She asked, leaning her head on her arms, her long hair spilling over them like a waterfall. Her gentle lilac eyes watched him, waiting for an answer. What else would he say? How could he deny that sparkle in her eye and that small smile on her lips? He stood up, ignoring his shaggy hair, and offered her a hand up. She accepted, placing her left hand in his right, a grin spreading across her face.

"I'd like to show you somewhere that's special to me. I think… I think you will like it." She said, pulling him along behind.

The others must have had other things to do, because none of them were to be found. They slipped on their shoes and pulled on their jackets, saying nothing at all. They walked out the door, looking very much like shadows instead of flesh and blood. Adrian walked on, straight into the woods that surrounded the rather large house. Kensuke jogged to keep up with the much smaller girls pace, surprising quick for her build. Then all of a sudden they were on the start soaked beach, the ocean quietly sucking up the sand and rolling back to purr contentedly. The moon reflected on the surface of the water, making the liquid look silver.

"Wow…" He murmured, not having seen anything like this before. And still she walked on, her pace relentless. Back into the woods they went, and then out onto a rock the hung about three feet over the water.

"It's my favourite place to sit and think." She said simply, shrugging. Her long hair lifted from her shoulders in a light breeze.

"Why… why would you show me this place? Wouldn't you like to have a place that you can come to and be alone?"

"You look like you think a lot. So… I thought you might like it." She shrugged again, turning back to look at him. The nineteen year old felt his breath catch in his throat. The silver light highlighted her hair, making it so bright that the rest of it seemed black as the night sky without stars. Her pale eyes and white skin gave off an almost eerie glow. She almost looked like an entirely different person. Almost like a goddess, he realized. Then she turned away from him, and she was herself again.

"It's really pretty at this time of night." She said, to no one in particular. Then she sat down, patting the ground next to her. Kensuke took this as his cue and he sat down, trying not to sit too close and trying not to sit too far. They sat there for awhile, only the mindless crashing of the waves breaking on the rocks around them.

"Adrian… I hope you don't mind my asking but… what happened to your parents? I mean, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to." He muttered, a blush spreading over his cheeks. She didn't answer him for a few minutes, and Kensuke assumed that she wasn't going to answer.

"My mother died in a car crash a few months ago. " She said quietly, and Kensuke had to strain to hear her voice. "I don't know where my father is, and I really don't want to know."

"Adrian…" he whispered resting one of his hands on her shoulder. She pulled her knees up to her chest, entwining her fingers and resting her chin on her knees. Her eyes took on an ageless look.

"It was a nice day. The sun was out, and the water was warm. My mother had told us that she was leaving our father earlier that day… I think.. I think he hit her, because they fought. That was why my brother took me to the beach. SO I wouldn't have to hear them fighting.

The waves sparkled as the sun danced and a young girl chased the shadow of her brothers kite.

"ADRIAN!" The girls head snapped up. The voice hollered again, demanding that she come at once. She ran off into the woods, her small feet bare and seemingly invincible. The voice shouted again, closer this time. The small brunette burst into the clearing, panting with the effort of exerting herself. Her father stood there, looking unnervingly calm. The fourteen year old stood, still panting slightly.

"Yes, father?" She asked.

"Adrian, did your mother tell you why she left?"

"No she didn't, daddy. She just said that you two didn't love each other like you used to."

"She lied to you Adrian." He stepped closer. "Your dear old mother lied to you. I bet you believed her, didn't you?" And closer. "You poor poor naïve little child. That's going to get you in trouble some day." He stood in front of her, looming over her. "It was your fault, Adrian. You made your mother leave. She couldn't handle how different you are from other children. You made her nervous with your maturity. You scared her, Adrian." He grabbed the collar of her t-shirt, hauling her off the ground.

"Daddy, please let me down!" she begged, her feet kicking, trying to find something to hold on to. Adrian couldn't get her breath, and her Liam had her puffer.

"Daddy, please! I can't breathe!" She whimpered, tears forming on her eye lashes.

"Think about what you did. Think about what you did to me. About what you made your mother do." His eyes were ablaze with anger. He tossed her across the clearing and into a tree as if she weighed nothing. Dazed, she was unable to collect herself in time to shout for Liam or to even stand on her own. He advanced on her, pulling something out of his pocket, something that reflected in the sunlight…

"Liam found me. He was wondering what my father wanted. He cleaned me up and took me home as if it were normal. I… I think Dad did it to him too. I hope not but…" She drifted off. She pulled the sleeve of her t-shirt up, showing him her the back of her shoulder, near her shoulder blade.

"That's where it hurt the most. It's where the scars are the worst. I suppose you can't see them in this light though." She pulled the sleeve down, trying to discretly wipe her eyes and failing.

"I really don't like remembering things like that. I… I don't like thinking that he may have done it Liam. Or worse." Her voice cracked and a tear rolled down her cheek.

Kensuke felt helpless. He had no idea what to do, he didn't know if he should hold her close, or if he should keep his distance, or if he should tell her that he felt she didn't deserve to go through that?

"Kensuke… may I have a hug?" She whimpered, pulling her knees closer to her chest, as if she were trying to protect herself from the memories of her father. Kensuke wrapped his strong arms around the small girl, and she unfolded, melting into his chest where she sobbed. I'm sorry… I'm sorry… she whispered, over and over. It's all right… it's all right. He would tell her, stroking her hair. She really didn't deserve this. She really didn't deserve the Angels coming after her. She really didn't deserve to have this brought upon her. He didn't want her to die in the struggle. He wanted her to be far away.

He clutched at her, holding her suffocatingly close. A soft breeze teased their hair, and the ocean lapped at the rocks. Nothing was wrong. Everything was normal. No. It was not. This poor girl had things she needed someone to hear about, and he longed to be that person. He wanted to be the one who could listen to all of her fears, and take them away. A bell chimed softly in the city, informing the young man that it was eleven o'clock.

And then Trouble arrived in the form of Tim. He walked through the woods, knowing exactly where the seventeen year old would be. And he saw them there. He saw him holding her. He saw Kensuke, holding Adrian. HIS Adrian.

"Kensuke. " He said shortly. The young man turned his head, and his expression sank.

"I.. she just… she wanted to show me this place… I didn't think… I-" He stammered through his sentence.

"Just get up. Bring her home in one piece." Tim turned to walk away.

"Wait! Tim, please. She's sleeping. Could… could you help me?" As emotionally detached as he was, Tim couldn't miss the hint of sadness in his voice. Maybe, just maybe the numbskull had realized that Adrian was not for him. That she belonged to Tim. Maybe, just maybe he would go back to where he had come from. But at the same time, his heart almost ached for the man. He understood what it was to love and not have the feelings returned. He lived with it everyday, constantly being reminded that Adrian only saw him as a friend. That she would never feel the way that he felt about her. He turned back and carefully picked up the small brunette, gently shifting her so that she was on his back, as if he were giving her a piggy back.

"Why don't… you tell me about yourself. ' Tim said, offering Aida a hand up. " I know we have at least one thing in common."

"What? I uh… I don't know what you' re talking about." He mumbled.

"Unrequited love." He said simply, shrugging as best he could.

"I… I guess. Nothing would ever come of us anyway. It can't." Kensuke said, rather sadly.

"Why would that be?" Tim asked, trying to keep his tone icy, but failing in doing so.

"You have to promise me that you won't tell her."

"I promise." Tim spoke, meaning it.

"The Angels. Those giant creatures. They're here. They want to take her back. No one's quite sure why yet, but they're working around the clock to figure it out. And… if we failed in battle… " He drifted off, not wanting to finish the thought.

They arrived at the house, Tim transferring Adrian from him back to her bed, tucking her in and giving her a light kiss on the forehead before leaving, saying no more to Kensuke. Grateful, he changed into his pajamas and climbed into bed.

He could have sworn that he was asleep before his head hit the pillow.


End file.
